Showing posts with label humour. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humour. Show all posts

Thursday, 27 June 2013

On pills and people…

The more I observe people (which I do quite a bit ;-) ), the more I feel
It is their little whims that tell us a great deal…
Plato says- You can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation.
In my opinion- it applies to pretty much everything- spoken or done!
So, speaking of such hints big and small,
I happened to think- wasn’t pill-popping another tell-all!
Now before you go getting any naughty thoughts,
I do not speak of the type of pill, but the way it pops!
How do you take your pills- quick ‘n easy- just gulp it down?
Or do you take ages, and do it with a frown? :P
A friend I have agonizes over medication for ages,
She pretends to forget, and leaves it on ledges...
Until good Samaritans ‘find’ it for her
And force it down the patient’s throat, before it could be ‘lost’ in another corner!
She is, in life too, a born runner;
Her motto- why kill it if you can shove it under!
There’s another I know, who will not avoid,
But will crush and sweeten
And thus he will swallow the ‘bitter pill’…
Be it the strife of life, or a feverish chill!
Then of course, there’s the sudden gulp-down-the- gullet!
Trying to fool his own self before he can object!!
This is the man who will jump into a pool, not ‘toe-dip’
And address his problems head-on, without a blip.
My own preference though is slow and steady,
One at a time… what is the big hurry!
I’d line up my issues too, to be dealt with one by one
And I insist that’s ‘systematic’, not procrastination!
So… these are the ones I have known in my time;
If you know another, do tell me- and we can make it rhyme!

The chronicles of Paraphernalia: the Girl, the Software, and the Wardrobe

Disclaimer: Complete and utter drivel. Do not read on if you have important things to do. Definitely read on if you enjoy bizarre ideas and amusing nonsense! :)

Wardrobes need cleaning. And as I tidied mine the other day, I found myself seriously considering labeled categories. Does that mean I own too much clothing? …Nahhhh!! I just have an incredibly ordered mind that reels at the thought of formal shirts getting mixed with round-neck Ts!
Imagine a row of hangers- colour coded, with suggestions of accessories; Heck, we could cross-reference! We could categorize by ethnicity / culture, occasion, season, purpose… even by names of people we could wear that garment around! :P
Plus, it would be great to keep track of what’s new, what’s old, what no longer fits (must face the unfortunate realities).
The advantages of labeled categories are many:
  1. The most obvious- I could find what I want when I want it!
  2. It’ll help me remember stuff I own. Maybe there’ll be fewer occasions where I go- “I have that?!”
  3. Will avoid embarrassing situations where I offer to lend clothes that I’ve already done away with.
A definite must-have would be In-Out baskets for laundry… and a system of putting ‘last-worn’ dates on the specific garment tags.
So I ran this idea past my office buddies, and I already have a couple of bids to create a software product to handle this burning requirement (yeh… I work in IT)! We propose to have a simple, graphic interface that lets users tag hangers and place them in categories. Some commonly used categories will be part of the ‘out-of-box’ software, and users can add some of their own. We intend to leave scope for customization.  Users will tag each hanger with the categories it would belong to. This would naturally enable logical grouping of accessories to be worn together. The most awesome feature would be this- the wardrobe will track the last-worn date from the time the hanger was last removed! Wow, I can see this is going to be one great product! What ideas may come, huh?

A’hunting we will go!

Finally, something did inspire me enough to post a blog! Strangely enough, as an inspiration this really isn’t anything deep and pensive… not at all a heavy meal for the thought system, honestly. Just one of those random incidents that start the ideas chugging along… traveling nowhere in particular and suddenly pulling up at a surprising destination!
          Let me begin at the beginning. This afternoon I met someone at work; a man I did not know, to be precise. Now this man came forth to my desk and struck a conversation. Having begun with this and that, the conversation soon went on to introductions. “Hi, I am Rahul…”, the guy drawled; I politely gave my name. This was followed by the typical awkward pause which characterises all introductions of this nature (you know what I mean!). This piece revolves around what is about to happen. I returned to staring at the screen, but was soon distracted by some activity in the periphery of my vision. I couldn’t help but notice that Rahul was frantically looking for something in all the pockets on his person. He tried the jacket, but the hand returned empty. The shirt pocket was similarly unhelpful. I was about to offer help, when he managed to fish something (presumably what he was looking for) out of his trouser pocket and opened his palm with a flourish- Happydent gum! Whatever it was that I had been expecting, this wasn’t it. I was too shaken to refuse and meekly expressed my gratitude.
          Now this strange ‘introductory offer’ started the mind rolling… the first obvious thought being, “Do I need to brush oftener??” Having ascertained that such was not the case, I explored alternative theories. This was not the first incident of its kind. I thought back and noticed a trend… I have always been offered gum by guys who’ve been ‘wanting to know me better’. And then I suddenly saw it! It was the ‘offering’! You know how the prehistoric man hunted, and dragged the loot to the prehistoric woman he wanted to ‘know better’? This was the same thing! Now dead bears went out of fashion a long, long time ago… So the average working man, handicapped by the lack of flowers or chocolates (which would be the logical first choice) at a workplace, offers the next best thing- Gum! Any woman who has worked in an IT company will tell you that Gum / Mint will definitely be an abundant resource on most male colleagues!
          Ha! So much for evolution! Though not conclusive proof, I feel pretty certain of the primitive instincts that still lurk within the Homo Sapiens Sapiens! Now I wonder what happens after the Gum offering… well, I ate it… I guess I should live up to my woman-ly ‘gathering’ instinct and save the wrapper! :P


:) Disclaimer: Although this incident is real, the names are entirely fictitious.